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    November 02

    不习惯的生活

          今天阴雨没有心情,也不知道写些什么,自己知道 自己还不习惯12点吃晚饭,不习惯这里的夜生活,不习惯这里的一切,不习惯天天阴雨。
          每逢阴雨的日子里,inGo心里总是很伤感,没办法容易伤感的男人都这样吧,所以自己也很容易受伤。
          刚刚在MOP上和一个朋友聊了许多,听了她的故事自己很矛盾!不知为什么会这样?
          她说她嫁给了那个男人,等于嫁给了一种生活。一个人生活了二十几年,忽然出现一个人,在她的身边,也这样生活着。她年纪不小了,周围的朋友一个一个都结了婚,为此,她也鼓起勇气去相了不下十多次的亲。没有感觉。与其说没有感觉,还不如说没有一点喜欢或厌恶的感觉。她不知道自己是怎么样的一个人,不知道想要怎么样一个人。 几次三番,她对自己说,也许就这个人吧。不讨厌,感觉还行。她说她结了婚,像是完成了一项任务。 最后,她才发现,这二十多年的生活已深刻烙下了印,一个人,只是一个人,没有另一个人的位置。她想去尝试,像所有人一样,像所有人期望的一样。可是,她做不到,虽然仅仅两个人,她还是无法适应,短短一个月,婚姻就这样无疾而终。
          听后inGo在想婚姻,如果结婚变成了任务,那爱又变成了什么?感叹爱情也好,生活也罢,只有在一次次失败的教训中才能领悟?最后也许已是伤痕累累,没有了勇力,忘记了自我!
          inGo不会为任何一个人去改变自己,不想自己失去自我,只能是最大限度的去宽容。
          感冒了,头很痛,用词,条理有误请见谅!百服宁真的能治头疼吗?

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